THE TROPHY BOYFRIEND

We take a turn to the right. This is a visibly lush neighborhood. I take a mental note of the architectural designs of some of the buildings along the road noting the numerical signage indicating the address of residence. The vehicle pulls over to a high gate with a ‘No Hooting’ sign. The guard salutes him as he drives in after which he quickly resumes to shut the metallic barrier whose design is commendable. Sia’s ‘Breathe me’ that was playing on the car stereo dies down after he has brought the car to a complete halt with the gear at Neutral. Guys who drive a stick tend to be very meticulous. ‘Here we are’. He says.  ‘Wow, great place.’ I supply in response. I look around after stepping out of the car. This is one of those neighborhoods you can just leave your Porsche sitting along the road with the doors wide open and the worst thing that might happen is someone coming along and closing them for you. Talk about affluence.

I have just known him only for the past five hours before he suggested we go to his place. I get into his living room and the paintings strike me. I also take note of the plain but high walls and a family portrait with him in it at the rear end of the room. ‘Phew, this must be his family. Thank God he’s not married!’  I mutter to myself.

He comes back from the stairway all casually dressed and asks me what I’ll have. I ask for some warm lime water. No martinis. I’m already a couple of martinis ahead of humanity. When he comes back with the glass of water, He positions himself right next to me reaching out to my hand. Gosh, I have a lot to ask this man! But then my mission here tonight may just be limited to a one nightie so I abandon that line of thinking.

Bedroom dimly lit with some soft rock playing in the background, I’m all showered and smelling nice thanks to all those shower things in the bathroom and naked. He’s bare too! Chest to chest, nose to nose, lights off and action! The dick has once again done the thinking for me!

The Morning after…

My eyes finally manage to open. OMG! It’s nine in the morning. I look around the room. No other human being is present. I reach out for a large cream towel on the chair just next to the closet. ‘I have to get out of here.’ I say to my sorry self. Just as I’m tying the towel around my waist he walks in. ‘Hey Cole, Morning beautiful!’ He says as he gives me a soft peck on the nose and starts playing with the African bracelet and notices the tattoo on my left wrist. ‘What does it mean?’  He quickly asks. ‘It’s deep…I need to go’ I say. ‘Not just yet Cole, my housekeeper has made breakfast for us. Please just have some shower or even go back and sleep if you please. It’s Sunday and you still need that rest considering last night was so busy…’ He pleads with some remarkable plastic smile on his face. I notice he’s a very attractive man but not in a way you’d quickly notice. He’s bare chest with some knee-length shorts on, has a piercing on his left nipple and a unicorn tattoo on the back of his right shoulder. In his early thirties but definitely he’d pass for a college student, managing the family business and also a consultancy enthusiast as his leisure job. That must really be something considering he’s got a life out of his daily schedule at least to date and hook up. Maybe it’s not a bad idea to hang around. I jump back in bed and he joins me saying it was a great night. We start chatting about people and stuff. At some point he tells me that his family knows his sexuality. I decide to finally have that deserved shower just in his room as he reads the dailies. I come out and I get busy at the dressing table by the window. ‘This is a very classy metro sexual man.’

I’m finally ready to head out for breakfast. He puts on a tight T-shirt written, ‘I love d*ck’.

We run into a short but well built youthful boy probably in his mid twenties at the Hallway. He’s introduced to me as the housekeeper. All this time my hand is being held by the master of the house. I ask him whether his housekeeper knows. He responds that one of the criterion to employ him was that he had to tell him and so far the guy hasn’t pestered him.

The breakfast table was a sight to behold. Dry cereal, fruit slices, honey, milk, cup cakes and sandwiches with cheese and salami in them. I noticed he was eating an African cereal meal: Lentils.

He finally offers to see me off. The car is now at its garage house located just next to the house. I notice there is also a youthful black Merc Convertible next to the ride we used last evening. I've never looked for money in the men I date but let’s not labor the point. Affluent men tend to be very confident, calculated not forgetting they got a PhD in screwing up with your mind if you ain’t so smart. He drops me at the shopping centre where I pick a matatu back home. A text is sent that I inform him when I get home. I ignore it of course with the mindset that he’s just being a gentleman. In the queer scene you never get to the second meeting so I may as well just forget about being modest enough to respond.

A week later

‘Hey, when are you visiting me again beautiful?’ he asks. Oh my Gay! This guy actually wants a next time. This is scary but in a good way. I oblige which means I’ve gone against the code and this means that the guy is now overqualified for the post of a man I had a one nightie with. I’m getting to like him and always feel the need to be in touch. Someone pinch me! The problem with having repeated sexual rendezvous with a guy you simply had a one night tryst is that sooner or later you start getting attached.

Adam, my influential friend opines that I have a lottery but I’m not so sure. I don’t know his intentions. I don’t want to be attached to anyone or anything, at least not just yet. So after careful thinking and consulting the code I came across the title trophy boyfriend. He’s defined as that comely man who you can comfortably grace with social indulgences e.g. dinners at a friend’s place, getaway weekends, and horse races e.t.c. The whole purpose is to ensure your friends are there anytime you are with him so as to help you build a portfolio that you are stable and you got a love life (God forbid!) but then you never get to spend any time alone. After dazzling the society you go back to your lonely abode. The rules of a trophy boyfriend are clear: Never get clingy, never ask questions, never involve them in your personal life and the cardinal one is never fall in love!

As I type this, I have Easter plans coming up. Once again I threw the chance to get a real boyfriend down the drain. I don’t regret but then just to cushion myself from any co-dependent shit storm I think the inventors of the pretty boys’ code did us justice by giving us the option of a Trophy boyfriend.

Forget about the code: I’d say he’s the guy you simply can’t let go after a one nightie so you keep him around just as a trophy but then ensure he has his space since you’ll never have bragging rights on him!