When the shag buddy catches feelings…

There is trouble brewing in paradise. My paradise. You people remember Tee, right? The guy who gave me that ‘we are sinning’ conversation and all? Well did I also mention that I’ve been involved in some cyclical recurring not-so-godly’ approved romps with him? Now you know. Guess what? He said I love you! (He was sober because the horniness had been taken care of so it is something very serious) C’mon you honestly didn’t think I’m one of those pretty boys who gets head over heels when a guy recycles those lines he usually uses on unsuspecting pretty boys just to get ass! It comes with experience just so you know.

Okay, okay…fine I know you may be wondering how I have been M.I.A and then I just come in here and start talking like it’s been business as usual. Well, to be honest I have been thoroughly swamped courtesy of my current assignment that is probably occupying most of my time and since it’s public knowledge my weekends are for sleeping and watching some flicks, that should be sufficient explanation. Not that I’m complaining besides, Murray opines that a ship in a port is safe, but that is not what ships are built for. Sail out to sea and do new things! Further, the few scratches I got from the new (and not so cheap) bitch in my life are healing at their own convenience. For a moment I almost started rummaging online for some vampire blood. I know it heals instantly.  I have since squared it with her and told her that she needs to co-operate with me since she’ll be hanging out with me for a while. But just in case you run into me, keep off my left elbow.

Back to my man intricacies: Now some former men have been making some not so welcome comebacks. Why do they always resurface when you have finally got your game figured out and the world revolves around yourself minus them in it? The code has always been against recycling men. Now you know why I don't do second chances when it comes to matters zega (Kamal don't sue me, it's the other way round). I mean, there is a reason they outgrew you in the first place or vice versa, right? These men's decisions are so ill timed and not welcome. Just the way clothes and shoes are to a zega man; one's standards, qualities and tastes in men change over time. 

Of late my phone is even getting those nice boy related texts. Creepy right? I know! I seriously hate ambush. It throws you off balance and makes your intellect questionable. I consulted what I do best when I find myself in such peculiar circumstances. The pretty boys’ code states that a shag buddy is NOT supposed to profess feelings without giving you sufficient notice when all along the arrangement has been casual. My friend and writing enthusiast J.Sisulu calls it a Common Fucking Arrangement hereinafter referred to as CFA. I largely agree with his sentiments.

All single zega men have that one guy they usually meet with for an occasional moment of consensual sin. Not that they are afraid of commitment or anything but isn’t that what they are for? Convenience especially when you are undergoing a dry spell and need some live remedy which excludes your hand, of course protected and all. It’s a society of instant money transfer, instant showers, instant tea, instant sex from a familiar person etc.  You and I know how the process of ‘searching’ can be tiring and time consuming. Same lines, same conversations, same sh*t…different boy.

So while I was in my reverie trying to evaluate my options (as if I have any).  I put on my thinking cap and one thing was clear. Repeated sexual patterns with someone is likely to end up into some kind of a complication but then I’m sure you’ll gladly counteract me and say different people makes one a hoe and a pride of being too generous  with their valuables. Yes. It’s so easy to say we are not the relationship types and that love is an illusion but what is that yearning that one develops with time? Catching feelings if I were to put it mildly…Months ago I had an obsession for this same man and if he’d proposed then I would have gladly said Yes and another bonus yes! Today I don’t even need to think about it. It’s a NO that came effortlessly and from my deepest convictions.  

Then again there is this thing I read from some bitch’s timeline that the ultimate test of being gay is falling in love with men not just screwing around with them! Profound, don't you think?

The shag buddy has always been a safe transition between you and the one (more like a temporary remedy) but when he finally wants more? Do the math...no situation is permanent. Okay, I got that from some preacher in some requiem mass I graced a while back. This applies to CFA's too. Maybe his mandate is complete when he gets these feelings and needs to be dropped into the friend zone or if his company is still difficult to do without, one can still keep him around. You do agree getting serviced can be a tough job at times and of course a boy needs his toy(s).

Would you get steady with your shag buddy? That is entirely in your court. I wouldn’t unless I subscribe to the same!

P.S: Last evening I managed to wait for that Castle story in one of our local stations. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. Reminds me of that adage: Stop looking for the prince, instead look for the castle since it comes with the prince in it! I still owe you that article on high maintenance boys, gay diggers e.t.c. Just be a little be patient. I'm thinking it should be my gift to you on my forthcoming anniversary. It’s not every day one gets a year older. Kisses!

CM