The (Almost) Final Discourse

My name is Cole. I'm the owner of a beautiful mind, a seductive sense of humour, a challenging but fun (and a beneficent) personality. Two and a half years ago I embarked on an expedition. I am not certain why. To find self? But then, I wasn’t lost though I know I have done some pretty disturbing things for my time. Entertain mayhap? Get fucked? Er…don’t even get me started here. I still can’t sit on ‘it’! (such a prickly affair really) Feel relevant? Well, I met a need occasionally and I’m proud of that.  To… just have a great time? Boy, didn’t I learn shit!

From down the Cape of Good Hope through  the fine men of the North, the balcony of men’s hopes and Tacos, right into the Fap’ Depot, Reke Marie and giving the Eiffel Tower to Cole, I must say I have had the time of my life in these streets. Oh, please don’t remind me of that heifer who got screwed at a cemetery or even that time when I was told that if I can’t swallow cum then I should consider getting sprayed  by the same occasionally as it is good for the skin! Yes, it all went down on C.D.R.  Interesting times huh? *Sighs*

I am standing here with a huge smile across my face looking at the imminent sundown beyond. The black folder that bears my new assignment rests on the stunted glass coffee table next to a cold cup of Twinnings English tea that I couldn’t finish due to the queer peculiar taste it left in my mouth. I momentarily reflect that giving fellatio is still better but then I notice it is me seeking a distraction. I mean, I have been on pins and needles for the past six months – postponing the inevitable.

The Situation Room (whose first post generated ninety views in seven hours) created circumstances that I had to contend with as a gay man. Good, bad, awkward etc. but I finally did find a raison d'être in discourse. I have not only met very fascinating people but also had experiences that will be etched in my wits for a long time to come. As a fellow pleasant person, I  say:

For reading my rants, for suggesting topics to address, for bearing with my moods, for trolling me, for the judgment, for just stopping by, for …I don’t know. For whatever made you give this blog traffic inevitably nudging it to thousands of hits in the shortest period it has subsisted.  Endings… Let me rephrase. I am proud to have given you a reason to stop by here, be it by your religious eye on new posts by accident or naught.

 “Blogging changes you,” an astute friend and fellow blogger I tremendously respect once opined to me. I thought it was his idea of being profound at the time but his words totally resonate with me at this moment in time. With all the 88 posts herein, I completely address my mind to the mundane, amusing, raunchy, bold and also the untold stories that the publish button had to interact with under my dexterous fingers. Wait, that reminds me, isn’t it here that I announced to the world how I hate being fingered! 

I digress. Baring real life experiences can be an arduous but fun task. Along the way you make enemies, treacherous friends; meet both real and edited people…it’s a struggle really but sometimes one has got to do what they have to do.

Endings. They are imperative and any reasonable discourse must be honored with one. I gaze at the sun drift away and I am oddly at ease. Perhaps it’s the fuzzy morrow I have appreciated never to dwell on much or maybe it’s the dignified interest(s) that awaits pursuit. Or maybe, just maybe, a story is after all honored with an end. And so folks, a fitting time has come when I have to put my pen down, stash away my little book of scribbled notes – largely abbreviated due to the naughty words therein, I would never have risked misplacing it lest a soul found it and made it their daily obligation praying for me – and say it’s been real. This is required of me as I humbly hang up my boots to pursue among other things a passion that just like the Cole’s Discourse Room (C.D.R), is of great import. 

This, ladies and gentlemen marks my final discourse. It is not my best but it is definitely not my last. 

P.S 

In addition to you my loyal readers, I am particularly grateful to Tamaku, Cuppatea & the Gay Nairobi Man, three of the queer bloggers whose works first spurred my blogging. I also thank Identity Magazine through Denis Nzioka for giving me a forum where I wrote my first queer article. Never looked back. Thank you Charles Baraka for making me inject emotion in my writing and getting out of my comfort zone. I am also proud of having met and treated with other respectable queer bloggers in Kenya. Sharing in their fertile minds, I strongly believe we have a place and a need to meet. In that regard, I do encourage the emerging writers to take up this therapeutic rendezvous, Godspeed!